Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
