We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
