i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
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