We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Randomize
