have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
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