So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Is it because I queefed?
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
A bitchslap is in order.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
