Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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