Hey man sorry I got all grabby
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Randomize
