Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
someone threw a dead crab at me
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Randomize
