I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
