you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
