She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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