During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
