She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
