I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
