hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize