this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize