if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
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