this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
