love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Randomize
