Barsexuality is the new black.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Randomize
