No, you can still breathe under the balls.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
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