i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
