It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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