I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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