Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize
