She is in my trunk
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
