I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
