I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
