I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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