thus making me awesome and them whores
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Randomize
