hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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