Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
