Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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