There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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