Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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