I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I wish I only lived at night.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize
