I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
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