and you said cock pushups were impossible
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
