dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize
