Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize
