Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
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