I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
