So drunk, too bad you don't want this
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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