She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Randomize
