the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
