i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
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