Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
