Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Randomize
