yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Randomize
